Appearance and Worth

Being a girl comes with many challenges. Most come from what seems like superficial beginnings. It is true that looks are not everything but for women, looks are heavily weighted with worth. Telling a young girl that she is ugly can ruin her self esteem for her whole life. Receiving a million compliments cannot outweigh that one sour remark that a little boy made in the fourth grade. Sometimes a comment that is not supposed to be taken negatively can cause just as much damage. For example, telling a naturally skinny girl that she is skinny can hurt. It may seem silly if you are not that girl because maybe you envy her physique, but that could be something she has grown to be self conscious about and now it is something that people point out about her constantly. 

I am not saying this because people tell me I'm ugly or make mean comments like that to my face, but because I am like the girl that gets called skinny. I am 22 and five foot maybe one inch. Everywhere I go people ask me how old I am if they don't know me, and they are completely shocked to hear I am not a teenager. It really grinds my gears especially when people say I look twelve. Come on now, I have been through puberty. I may not be curvaceous like most expect 22 year women to be, but I am clearly not twelve. It is very insulting when people say things like that to me. I am obviously not acting like a teenager or an adolescent so why would you think I was one? Because I am short? 

I have struggled my whole life with feeling inferior to people but God has made me realize I am worth just as much as anyone else. Even though I know that, it is hard from time to time when people think I am a child. How am I supposed to be taken seriously if people think that? It is a problem that I am not sure how to change or how to feel better about. Older women and even young women often tell me how much I will love looking young when I am older. But when does that begin? 

Since there is so much make-up, clothing, and hair products in the world, I figured I could make myself look older with these things. I have changed my hair from short to long and long to short, from red to brown to dark brunette. Nothing has ever made someone say, "Wow, you look your age today." I have figured that there is nothing I can do about it so I just need to stop trying to change my appearance and be happy with what I have. Which, is safe to assume, is much easier said than done. I have days where I feel confident in my own, young looking skin but it can easily be shattered by someone making a comment that they thought I was twelve or sixteen. 

I want to bring awareness to what you say when talking to a girl or a woman. We are fragile creatures even if it seems like we are not. I would suggest not commenting on body size or parts to be safe. Tell her she looks pretty today or maybe compliment her scarf. I don't know. But a good rule of thumb is that if you would not say the opposite of what you want to say, then don't say anything at all. (By that I mean, if you want to tell a girl she is super skinny think about if you would tell someone they looked super fat...probably not. Hopefully not.) 

Thanks for reading my rant. Hopefully it can help spare the feelings of some ladies out there.